My Visit To The Nation Of Japan

I Arrive

Yoko cried, "Down there, White Gaijin," and as she spoke her form undulated, the vast wings sprouting from her sailor suit beating. Clinging to her calves, I was borne aloft through the terrible Eastern clouds as the starry light from her henshin shot around and before us through the starry darkness. Brightly and steadfastly and swiftly as an angel may soar heavenward with the soul it rescues from the grave went the flight; till I heard at last in the nether distance a hum of Asian voices and the mutter of cubicle toil.

The towering corporate skyscrapers below remained dead and cold as sushi, veiling the strange sociological changes characteristic of the teeming Asiatic hordes; yet above its surface there ministered a ghostly brace of mystic American Mastercards which breathed, but shewed no voice; moved, but could not leave their appointed place; passed through life without consciousness, to death without bitterness; wore the beauty of youth, without its passion; and declined to the weakness of age, without its regret. Gazing upon them, rapt, with a thrust of her anklets Yoko kicked me off.

Emperor Akihito In Drag

I fell, bounced on a series of rickshaws, and after rolling to a halt, sat myself down for some time, musing sorrowfully, till at length I rose and took my way with slow footsteps towards the place where I could heard the sounds of Japanese. Rubbing my bottom, I entered what appeared to be a house of refreshments, when from beneath the Shibuya neon, a most extraordinary creature slid towards me. I asked her name, for the creature was apparently of the feminine gender, and was told that, quite the contrary, the apparent maiden was none other than the Emperor, Akihito! I enquired as to the curious nature of the ruler's present accoutrements, and His Majesty informed me that he regularly elected to vacate the throne on alternating weekends, to mingle with his people by cavorting about disguised as Sailor Mars, Pokemon, or, in this instance, as the local Harlot. As he passed me a Lowenbrau and licked my ear, I could not but wonder darkly what manner of society I had stumbled onto.

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